That same old feeling

Another holiday season has come and gone. A month of my birthday and a trip to NY and Christmas and New Year and school performances and gift buying and cookie making. It came and it went. Now a blur. It's the eve before the actual new year starts for us, the REAL start of schedules and school and work. Bert went to bed early because yea...let's get a good start to the new year. But there lies the difference between mothers and fathers. He is sawing logs and I am pacing the house. Anxious. I have both the dishwasher and the washing machine going simultaneoulsy. I have paced the house collecting shoes and sorting coats and setting out water bottles and lunch bags. Another semester starts tomorrow at our new school location no less. And I am excited for what the year will bring but as usual it comes with sadness. I love it when everyone is home all day and we are on a schedule of our own making. I like the coziness of Christmas break and family gathering and friends getting together and eating too much and singing silly songs. The passing of the holiday means the passing of time and I will never again have a 6 year old and 17 month old at Christmas again. I'll admit, I have some regret. I was a little more about errands and logistics this year than I wanted to be. And I yelled. I have never been a mama that yelled, really--never. But the 5 year stretch isn't enough to keep little hands from touching and antagonizing and I found myself having to raise my voice more than I liked. I hate that. 

But as I type this, I already feel something that sounds like forgiveness. With fun there has to be discipline, it's part of my job as a parent. And I read some really wonderful things today about keeping the magic of the holidays and vacation alive in the everyday. I'm anxious tonight not because I think that the Lord doesn't have everything under His control because I know he does. I'm nervous because it's my job as a mom--to be intentional about sending my baby out into the world again tomorrow. To know we can't keep sleeping in and eating cookies for breakfast and staying up watching movies. It's disheartening and sad for something to end when it was good. And I guess that isn't regret but instead accomplishment--we did it, we had a wonderful holiday. 

January has started and I have decided I love January. I used to dread it as a let down after so much fun. But with the busy schedules of this season of life, I love how slow it is. It is usually a month of catching up...on rest, on reading, on family time. The first week of January holds a lot of sad memories for me but happy ones too.

Tomorrow morning I will (hopefully) get up early. Crack open the first few pages of our devotional--a fresh start. And then walk Loulie to her new school. Prayers for all the mamas that will be back at it tomorrow with expectations and goals. Ideas of what they want their year to looks like. I have picked three words that I hope will set the tone for our 2016...adventure (even in the mundane), presence, and margin. 

As this old feeling creeps in, I am reminded of how thankful I am that I already long for the goodness of my present life and the blessing I have been given. 

Loulie-isms

Just when I think that age 5 has taken a turn for the serious....

I came downstairs ready for church. Really just showered and dressed for apparently the first time in a while...
"Mama, you look so beautiful!"
"Thank you, Loulie"
"I've never seen you look like this before. Really! You look like the girl from Annie."
"Ms. Hannigan?!"
"No, Daddy Warbuck's girlfriend. You look as pretty as Daddy Warbuck's girlfriend."


Friday night I walked into the den..
"Whatcha doing Loulie?"
"Drinking kombucha and reading non-fiction."


Loulie asked to please watch our wedding video. While we were waiting for it to load...
"Is this movie going to be in color or black and white?"


After watching the wedding video and asking if she can have my wedding dress...
"I'd like a cape too. Can I get a cape like yours to wear over my bun?
(she meant a veil)


Reading Loulie a book that quoted MLK...
Jumps up "I know that human.I know that human. He was a peaceful human and he had a dream. Martin Luffer King Junior!"

She also knows most of the words to "Uptown Funk." Let's hope she doesn't share at school beyond "uptown funk, i'm gonna give it to ya"

Things I am loving...

Date night! Hallelujah! Never was I able to take colicky Loulie out at this age but Tad slept through the whole movie...

Begin Again--excellent movie and even better soundtrack. Loulie and I have been dancing to it All week...

Tad's alfalfa sprout...

Loulie's VBS performance Sunday night...

How much Loulie relishes being a big sister...

She can't keep her hands off him (I can't either for that matter). And the other day she said (in her gush voice) "It's impossible not to hug him, he's just so sugary."

Babies who sleep...

Family nap time...

My biggest problem...

I basically do this to Loulie at least once a month and poor Tad suffered the same scene at about 5am this morning...

Snowmageddon

I'm adding Cruise Director to my resume after this week (month really). We have already had a lot of days inside these past few weeks and then school has been cancelled today and tomorrow due to icy conditions. I have managed to entertain Loulie going on 12 hours without any internet or television! We have baked to the last of the flour, crafted with every supply available to us, done every possible yoga pose, listened to the Frozen soundtrack I lost count of how many times, made breakfast lunch and dinner from scratch, read, put on plays, done make overs and kept the home fires burning while Bert went to work.  Who says mothers don't do anything? (I'm referring to that lovely piece floating around the web titled "Stay at Home Mothers Don't do Anything")  I'll answer that since I haven't had my own mind to myself since about 7:30 this morning. Literally, I have moved from organizing one form of entertainment to the next minute by minute. My girl hates the cold as much as I do so inside it has been. Needless to say, I am exhausted. But a few times today, Loulie has looked at me and said "You are my favorite mama. I'm so glad you had me." or in one instance she looked at a picture and said "You are always such a pretty mama. I gone be like you when I get big." Talk about a rejuvenator. To even it out, I will admit that she also looked at me at one point and said "Are you going crazy?" Guess I don't have that great of a poker face because yes, I thanked God 100 times today that I live in Charleston and not Minnesota. How do all those northerners not go crazy?!
So we'll be back at it tomorrow. I am determined to style it up like Ralphie's brother and get a good walk in. Bert said some kids were sledding down Wappoo Cut today. I think it might be fun to walk somewhere that is normally too trafficky tomorrow so you might see us running down the middle of Folly or up the James Island Connector ;)
--We made these homemade pretzels tonight. Delicious! And quite a feat since I normally warm up Trader Joes or Whole Foods. They were a perfect little dinner with a side salad and different dips. I made cinnamon sugar for Bert and LB likes salted. I also saw a variation with rosemary that might be fun now that I have my herb garden from my mom for Christmas.

--In other news, our company sold a whopping 8 bags of ice today. What the what? If this weather keeps up, the Dashers might be homeless. Bert compared himself to Kristoff which was Frozen reference #4568 today.
--Speaking of Frozen references, it is all Loulie can talk about. The other day she was hiding in a rack at a store and told me that she had to hide her frozen powers from people so they couldn't see her. When she woke up this morning and Bert told her that the white on the ground wasn't snow but ice, she said "told you I had the power to freeze things." Ya'll, we're obsessed. Elsa is hosting a tea party at a local store in a few weeks. I CANNOT wait to surprise Loulie!
--One last thing in case you too are going nuts and need a little laugh. My friend sent me this video last night. There is so much truth in it, you have to laugh to not cry.
So I'm dreaming of warmer days and regularly scheduled programming but also enjoying this time at home making memories with my girl. From all the facebook and instagram pictures it seems like we are all doing the same. My heart goes out to all the kids stuck in Atlanta. I cannot imagine being away from Loulie over night or stuck on the highway. I'm thankful we live within running distance of Loulie's school. I know it's false security but I like knowing I can get to her in minutes if needed. Prayers lifted for all the families that didn't get to cozy up together tonight.

  

Their rendition of Goldilocks and the Three Bears

One Part Rest/ One Part Fun: A Week One Recap

This week has been the perfect combination of rest and entertainment. It is exactly what I wanted the last week of the year/ the second week of Christmas break to be. Although, I am still not ready for school to start back on Monday, I do always like getting back on a schedule. The irony of school is that the first few years of Loulie's life I just really wanted a few hours a week to get things accomplished. Now that she is in school (albeit only until 11:10), I really would love her being home with me almost all the time. She is so independent and fun and easy now.
We spent a lot of time this week sleeping in and staying in pajamas until the 4th hour of Today ended. We did experiments and crafts, made art and put together Lego sets for hours. We read our Christmas books for the last time before boxing them back up for next year. It was sweet and relaxing and fun. Now my home is a disaster with a Christmas tree still up, I haven't cooked a healthy dinner one night and I have only been to the gym once but you can slack on all these things when you know your child is only home one week and in a few days it's back to 6:30 wake up calls.

Bert and I went out New Year's Eve for the first time in 5 or 6 years. We kind of joked ahead of time that we may not really know what to do at a party without children anymore. It was a surprise party for a friend and ended up feeling a lot like a new year's eve in high school huddled around fire pits listening to a DJ. Bert even came home and heated up a frozen meal and then proceeded to fall asleep on the sofa fully clothed while watching Juno, just like a 19 year old. My sweet sister kept Loulie under the premise that if she went into labor, I would be there in 15 minutes. She texted me this picture of Loulie at 7:15 with the caption "Rocking New Years."

Unfortunately, this year we were not able to throw our annual Post Plunge New Year's Party. The beach house was rented and the whole day ended up being very anticlimactic. The weather was less than desirable, I forgot our costumes and when we arrived at the Plunge, I realized my camera battery was dead. I really hope that isn't an indication of the year ahead. We persevered through though. We still went despite botched plans and some friends threw a "Plan B" dinner where I made sure to stuff myself with collards. Loulie had a ball and we all decided if there was ever a year to play it low key that it was this one.

I started watching Girls this week. I usually have a few good books and a good show for those dreary January days and long nights. I picked Season One up from the library  and have to say that this show is the biggest disappointment so far. I find it so depressing and pretty gross yet somehow mildly entertaining.  Somehow by the end of episode 10, I was rooting for Hannah. And I know art, especially TV, is an exaggeration of reality but it kind of panics me that this is what life is like for 24 yr olds. Just gross! I miss the days of Carrie Bradshaw.

And in possibly the sweetest recollection of the week, Loulie has set up a sleeping bag and tent in her room outfitting it with about 5 Lego sets and a stack of books. She insists that Bridget sleeps with her and I can hear them through the monitor until late each night. Last night it was singing and tonight she read Bridget about 10 books before finally crashing. It's gotten to where Bridget waits in the tent during Loulie's bath and sometimes during the day.

All in all, it's been a good start to a new year. Back to the grind soon enough and I'll be paying the piper this weekend for all the sweets I've devoured over the holidays. And in usual fashion, I'm listing out things to look forward to after such a fun holiday. But I think a new nephew arriving this week is enough for now.

Happy New Year!

Fall Actually (Our Knoxville Visit in Pictures)

Bert left last weekend to go sailing for 10 days and after spending a fun weekend at home just the girls, we took off for Knoxville in hopes of experiencing actual fall weather. The drive up was mostly still green but we were lucky enough to drive home yesterday through the most gorgeous colorful mountains. It was such a treat to be up there at the peak and to get to do so many true fall activities. 

We skipped hiking this time for a trip to Oakes Farm for pumpkin picking, hay rides, a corn maze, farm animals and games. There is just something about looking out over the mountains and changing leaves while picking your pumpkin versus carving it in 80 degree weather surrounded by palm trees that get you in the spirit of autumn.

We hit up all of our favorite spots--The Plaid Apron, Tomato Head, Bliss, and of course, Mast General because who can resist store that has a whole section of candy bins? We also found some fun new antique stores and attended a few gallery showing for 1st Friday. 

My mom let Loulie do her hair and make up every morning and now she is ticked that I am not letting her wear make up every time she walks out the door. She said between the Paris tea room, the art show and getting her hair done; she feels like Fancy Nancy. 

I feel like being back in reality is a little too much after a fun week away.  SO thankful that we had a chance to get to the mountains this fall though. It was such a blessing to be with my parents and have a whole week off from school schedules and responsibility. 

Happy Monday to All!

Things That Go Bump in the Night (Halloween at Lovey's)

I'm almost positive that the person that coined the term "things that go bump in the night" was not referring to ghosts and goblins but to little children hopped up on Halloween candy. Because the clock was chiming 11 by the time my little ghoul calmed down and finally went to sleep. And because I had chugged a little caffeine to keep up with her, I then tossed and turned all night as well. So it's a good thing the coffee is flowing this morning.

Loulie really LOVED Halloween this year and it was fitting that we were in Knoxville. October is my mother's month--she loves all things orange and really plays up Halloween. Our first 20 minutes in Knoxville were spent with Loulie running all over my parents' house checking out all the decorations and talking to her Lovey about candy and costumes.

On Wednesday we happened upon this crazy prissy store/tea room, The Paris Apartment. Just as we were laughing over all the over the top decor and about to duck out, this woman pops out of nowhere and invites Loulie to attend their annual "Witches Fly In" luncheon the next day. It was straight out of a movie--I was all apprehensive "maybe we'll be here" and Loulie was like "YES" and my mom was like "An adventure? Put us down!"

So we show up Halloween morning to an entire restaurant full of old women dressed in the most elaborate witches' garb you have ever seen. You can see in the pictures below how shocked we were--it was quite a production. Loulie's favorites were the "jewelry witch" and the one with orange braids we decided looked just like Room on the Broom witch. I wish I had taken better pictures but like I said, I was in shock. Side note--the food was super delicious and the tea room would be perfect for a birthday celebration or luncheon.

Last night we trick or treated in my parents' cute neighborhood after a neighborhood cookout with Loulie's friend, Madeline. Loulie decided to go as a unicorn in keeping with her recent obsession with My Little Pony. We teased up a pink mane and made the last minute decision to paint her face. You could tell she felt like a rockstar and was so cute running from house to house. My shy girl was surprisingly outgoing--probably because I threatened to take her candy if she didn't say thank you. But seriously, she had the time of her life and ended the night handing out candy with GDaddyBoy. 

So my least favorite celebration of the year turned out to be a hit this year. I'm already feeling a bit anxious about the holiday season. I've spent the morning pouring over my calendar trying to organize the next 8 weeks until Christmas-yowza! I know we say this every year but this year especially, the holidays seem to be on crack! We went shopping on Wednesday and Loulie pointed out that stores already had their Christmas trees up. Really?--we hadn't even carved a pumpkin at that point. I am determined not to get stressed out this year--to really enjoy my family and the traditions we have built. More on that later--I have a few ideas to simplify the season and hope to do a post on that later. Hope everyone had a Happy Halloween! Go Dawgs!

 

A couple of things

We just got back in town last night after 6 days away in Disney. What an experience--I say that tongue in cheek because even though there were definitely magical moments, I think my child might be the first in history to ask to leave Disney World because she "just wants to be at home." But the trip and her birthday celebration were so sweet and I can't wait to upload all my pictures and relive all that was memorable.
Which brings me to this morning. Since we missed Loulie's actual birthday at school, they celebrated today. Montessori schools actually do a "Life Celebration" where the child walks around the sun the number of years they have been alive. Loulie and I were to make a timeline with pictures and milestones. Since we arrived home so late last night, I did a big no-no and just made the poster by myself this morning. And as I was piecing together the pictures and years and milestone bullet points, I realized there is so much I don't remember about Loulie's second year of life. What were we doing?! She started  walking and talking before turning one and started preschool and ballet right before her second birthday. But I cannot remember a thing about that year in between!
So that motivated me to get on the ole blog again. I have soooo many unfinished posts from this summer, well really the last 6 months. Bert actually makes fun of me. He'll walk by my office, see me slumped over the computer and ask "How many times have you read and edited that post?" He's right though--the type A, oldest child, perfectionist does not always serve me well. I have a ton of posts basically finished by any other standards, except that I think it just sounds a little off. Who really cares though?--I keep this blog for my own memory and outlet, occasionally posting something for the masses that I might share. All of probably ten people visit this thing.
Long story longer, I am going to go back and hopefully update posts as well as keep up better. I hated that feeling of not remembering a whole year this morning and this blog is a great way to relive.
Also, it has been a whirlwind of two weeks--school starting, Labor Day, get ready for vacation, 4 hectic days of vacation. Driving home yesterday, I realized the summer is over. I haven't even had time to think about it. Hopefully, a regular schedule will commence although I've found myself wandering the house this morning not knowing where to begin on my "Once Loulie Starts School" to do list.
Anyhow, I hope everyone has a eventless Friday the 13th. Ours started out with a bang when I unbuckled Loulie for drop off and she leapt over the seat and clung to my neck not wanting to go into school causing me to jump my car over the curb. You should have seen the look on her assistant teacher's face. Geez! Moment to remember. Thankfully, she was fine by the time I showed up for her celebration and she was nothing but proud that her mama was there and her friends were singing to her. So the unlucky morning has already taken a turn for the better!

Happy Rest-filled Weekend!

Dog Days of Summer

It is a sin that we live 5 minutes from the beach and go so rarely. A goal of mine this summer has been for Loulie and I to go more, which we have, but Bert has only been twice (maybe). I decided Friday night to remedy that. Instead of packing up for or usual Friday night at Freshfields dancing, we decided at 6:30 to throw on our bathing suits and head to the beach. Besides, it has gotten so humid here, by the water is really the only place anyone wants to be. 

6:00 is my favorite time of day to spend at the beach. There were still a good many people there, but if you have ever been to Folly, there is no pretention or reason to be at all self concious. So Bert and I both joined Loulie riding waves and rolling in the sand. We played until dark and then threw on cover ups and walked through the little downtown for dinner. It was a sweet family night--the kind that isn't big plans but that you will probably remember with more fondness than the nights you did have big plans.

The rest of the weekend was pretty low key--a birthday party, church, ice cream date with good friends.  Bert and I did have a movie date Saturday night--The Way, Way Back.  Loved it! We are pretty particular about movies and always rave when we see something different. It was a dark comedy and we were still talking about it Sunday afternoon. Not giving anything away, I did have a hard time seeing Steve Carrell play the antagonist. 

This morning starts a busy week--I am so towing the line between schedule and just having fun. On one hand, I feel like we need to be working on adjusting bed times for the early school time we have coming to us but I also want to pack in as much fun and freedom as we can into the next few weeks. Looking at the calendar though, I think life is beginning to force us into good behavior--early bedtime, eating better and getting organized. I can handle--I thrive on structure. But oh how I am going to miss those late nights at the beach.

Memorial Day Weekend

This weekend was near perfect. Yes, Bert had to go into work everyday but thanks to technology and new monitoring systems, we were given much more time with daddy on a holiday weekend than in years past. I woke up Friday with all the grief of the previous days gone. It was gorgeous weather, unusually cool for Charleston. That coupled with kick offs for all the quintessential Charleston summer events, I couldn't have asked for a better start to summer.

I love that we have traditions with Loulie as well as other family friends that we now anticipate. It's a benefit that I didn't realize would come with Loulie getting older and it's a joy to see she and her friends at the same events year after year but experiencing it a new stage in maturity. Friday we packed up our picnic for the first of hopefully many Freshfields Concerts with friends down at Kiawah. I wish I had taken pictures because watching all those girls jam in front of the band was hilarious!  Loulie stayed front and center all night and never quit dancing!
Saturday we woke Bert up bright and early. I'm sure after a night of beer drinking, he loved having all three girls jump on the bed to T Swift. He finally gave in and got up to take us to the Piccolo Spoletto Kid's Festival, probably one of my favorite events of the year...

 All the children were mesmerized by this fairy that didn't say a word but sprinkled magic dust (glitter) on all the kids. This would have been Loulie's favorite part had we not then run into the pony rides, wall painting, face painting, a marching band parade and music performances. The downtown farmer's market now has an insane amount of food trucks compared to last year. Loulie is obsessed with Tianna, the Disney princess from New Orleans. She has asked 100 times what "Tianna's man catching beignets" are so we waited in line forever so that she could try that yummy goodness. Needless to say, she didn't really want to share.  

 On Sunday, we played hookie from church to attend another one of our favorite events. The Abominable Feed & Seed Marching Band from Atlanta comes every year and performs a patriotic concert on the front steps of the U.S. Customs House. It is both crazy and heartwarming. There's a part where they play the song for each arm of the military and those that serve(d) stand up--lump  in throat moment for sure. Afterwards we headed to Amen Street for lunch with Meme and Bruce.

 And for Memorial Day, we laid low, went to the pool for the first time this year and made a fun dinner.  Loulie and I made a berry pie together and talked about how thankful we are for those that served our country and what it means to be free. It was a sweet weekend filled with great memories. I'm super excited about this summer and hoping to make the most of my time with Loulie before she starts school 5 days a week next fall. I'm thinking about making a mini bucket list so that it doesn't blaze by without doing all the things we want to do.

Happy June Friends!