Reminiscing

Dear Loulie Bug,

I have such joy thinking about this night one year ago. I was scheduled to be induced but had prayed and prayed that you would come on your own. I was worried about forcing you into the world against your will (as you get older you will come to see your mother's hippy mind) and had done all things possible to get you to come "naturally".

I remember thinking when I crawled in bed that night--"well, I guess she didn't come early." I fell asleep praying that the induction was the right decision and I willed your life and my labor to the Lord. And fell asleep. For an hour.

In true Loulie fashion, you came on your own terms and at your own time. Which is to be expected--both your father and I march to our own drum and do things when and how we see right to do them. I hope that you too will always listen to your heart (your own internal time keeper) and not allow others or the world around you to define you or persuade you into anything.

You are your own little person. On 9-9-09 at 4:44 pm God gave your daddy and me the best blessing and gift--much more than we had imagined for ourselves.In the past twelve months, you have already shown so much of the person God made you to be--smart, independent, loving, curious and aware of the world around you. People stop us all the time to say hello to you--you wave to everyone. Your loving and happy nature is contagious and it's impossible to get through errands without someone wanting to love on you.

I am blessed each day by having you. The best decision I ever made was to stay home to be with you these past 5 months. I love being with you and so does your Daddy. We always said if we had children, we would want to be with them and share in experiences as a family. And we do. I am grateful each and every day God chose to give you to me. You are His first and foremost but he loves me enough to trust me to take care of you here. For that, I am grateful everyday.

I cannot wait to see what this second year brings. (Hopefully, a little more sleep) A lot of fun, a lot of learning and a lot of incredible memories as a family.

Never did I dream that I would love motherhood this much. A year and a half ago, in church, I was fretting over how I was going to take care of you. I closed my eyes and listened to the music playing and all that kept going through my head was " Your children will be your greatest gift and blessing and you will love it thousands more than you think you will." As usual, God's words to me have been proven true!

Happy Birthday to my sweet Punkin Pie Heart! I LOVE YOU!